today is your birthday.

eighteen years ago today, you drew your first breath. it’s impossible to believe its been over a year since you drew your last one.

i never celebrated a birthday with you while you were alive. at this point, the time i knew you as my friend is less than the time you’ve spent in heaven.

but the impact you’ve had on my life is impossible to describe. people call me crazy because i’ve not forgotten you. they don’t understand the love that practically poured out of you. they never saw your comforting smile.

today i went to the grave for the first time. i sat there and talked to you for longer than i ever got to talk to you when you were alive. it still doesn’t seem real. i believe it. but somehow i still expect you to run up and hug me one morning in the guard room.

my feelings are a whirlwind. i’ve not been the same since you left this world.

i miss you, timothy.

happy birthday, sunshine.

smile so radiant it put the sun to shame

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